johnhandleyd/thesa
Text Generation • Updated • 6 • 1
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5566fab2a64752d71ec3ca69 | Escalating disagreements between mother and wife | My wife and mother are having tense disagreements. In the past, they’ve had minor differences. For example, my wife would complain to me my mother is too overbearing; my mother would complain my wife is lazy.
However, it’s intensified lately. I think the cause is my wife talked back to her once. Now, any little disagre... | https://counselchat.com/questions/escalating-disagreements-between-mother-and-wife | Family Conflict | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>What you are describing is something psychologists have termed "triangulation" which is what happens when one family member will not talk to the one they have a problem with and goes to a third member of the family to complain instead. You have been "triangulated" by your wife and mother.</p><p>This ... | 0 |
5566f94fa64752d71ec3ca64 | I'm addicted to smoking. How can I stop? | I'm planning to have baby, so I have to quit smoking - but it's hard. Sometimes it's not a physical need, it's mental.
I cannot help myself from thinking about smoking. What can I do to get rid of this addiction? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-addicted-to-smoking-how-can-i-stop | Substance Abuse,Addiction | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>Hi. Good for you in planning ahead to do what's healthiest for your baby (and yourself). That's a great first step! It's also good that you are able to identify that it's not always a physical need that's driving the addiction.</p><p>For the next steps, I would suggest trying to figure out when the psychological cra... | 0 |
5567d26887a1cc0c3f3d8f46 | Keeping secrets from my family | I have secrets in my mind, and I don't know what to do with them. I don't want to tell my wife and mom because I don't want to hurt them. But I'm not sure how long that I can keep the secret to myself.
What should I do? It's becoming annoying and making me anxious. Help me out | https://counselchat.com/questions/keeping-secrets-from-my-family | Family Conflict | Jeevna Bajaj | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jeevna-bajaj | <p>It sounds like keeping the secrets has become a problem for you now. There are several things to consider before you make a decision.</p><p>- You mentioned that you don't want your wife and mom to know because you don't want to hurt them – why would it hurt them? </p><p>- Is it necessary for them to know this inform... | 0 |
556bed15c969ba5861709df5 | The Underlying Causes of Being Possessive | I am extremely possessive in my relationships and this is hurting my friendships. How can I fix my underlying issues? | https://counselchat.com/questions/the-underlying-causes-of-being-possessive | Behavioral Change,Social Relationships | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>Hi there. It's great you are able to realize there are other issues going on with someone who feels possessive. At the root of it is fear. Fear of losing someone, fear of being alone, fear of not being good enough. All those fears can lead to low self-esteem and feeling like you have to control other people so you d... | 0 |
556ba115c969ba5861709de6 | Can I control anxiety without medication? | I had a head injury a few years ago and my mind races all the time. I have trouble sleeping and have a lot of anxiety. Every medicine I have been on my body rejects; I get sick to my stomach and get blisters in my mouth. How can I calm my self down? I'm a wreck. | https://counselchat.com/questions/can-i-control-anxiety-without-medication | Anxiety | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>You didn't say what or how many medications you've tried. Certain anxiety medications can make you feel nauseous, but I haven't heard of any that cause mouth blisters, so there may be some other underlying medical issue there. I would definitely talk to your primary care physician and whoever has prescribed the medi... | 0 |
556b6940c969ba5861709de4 | How do I break an unhealthy relationship pattern? | I want a secure relationship with someone that wants to be with me and who will actually put effort into it.
I seem to gravitate toward unavailable men and those that want intimacy and no relationship. I let men dictate and control me because they accuse me of being controlling. I let men emotionally abuse me and I am ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-break-an-unhealthy-relationship-pattern | Relationship Dissolution | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>It is a good thing that you have recognized that you have been in some unhealthy relationships and that you are wanting to break this pattern. You seem to have some good insight into the situation.</p><p>The type of behavior that you are describing is usually rooted in childhood issues with insecure attachment bond... | 0 |
556bec8cc969ba5861709df3 | I have anger issues. I am extremely explosive about the simplest things | I easily recognize this but have no control over it and need suggestions for managing my anger. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-have-anger-issues-i-am-extremely-explosive-about-the-simplest-things | Anger Management | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I suggest that you work on emotional awareness. </p><p>Emotional awareness basically means knowing what you are feeling and why.</p><p>Emotional awareness also means that you can identify the link between the way you are feeling and your actions. In other words knowing that your feelings dictate what you do.</p><p>O... | 0 |
5566f9a2a64752d71ec3ca67 | I’ve suffered from insomnia and nightmares for about 3 years | It takes me a long time to fall asleep; I’d estimate about two hours. I often have nightmares, starting with being eaten by a monster, and I often wake up frightened and unable to breathe.
I believe I started losing sleep after breaking up with a girlfriend of 8 years. Also, my father’s business went bankrupt and my m... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-ve-suffered-from-insomnia-and-nightmares-for-about-3-years | Sleep Improvement | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>First of all, exercise is always beneficial for your physical and emotional health. That's great that you have added this in your routine. Have you also considered altering your diet? Certain foods are linked with poor sleep. For example, alcohol, caffeine, nicotine and high fat content foods do not bode well with q... | 0 |
5570b7fea03de6c365f45ba1 | Unethical Therapy Practices | What do you do when a therapist and a parent drugs a child and makes up lies in order to stop the other parent's custody visitation? | https://counselchat.com/questions/unethical-therapy-practices | Professional Ethics,Legal & Regulatory | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I will admit I am confused about this question. Are you the other parent in question or a concerned coworker of this therapist? </p><p>Therapists do not prescribe or have access to medication. Most therapists won't even get involved in a custody battle. They know there is a good chance of their records ending up ... | 0 |
556bf606c969ba5861709df8 | My friends accusing me of having problems | They're calling me names like hypocrite and a baby even when they act in the same manner as I do. I'm tired of being called names. What should I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-friends-accusing-me-of-having-problems | Social Relationships | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>It sounds like your confused as to why your friends would be calling you a hypocrite when they act in the same manner, correct? Communication is key to any relationship. I would recommend speaking with your friends face-to-face to address why they feel your behavior is concerning. </p><p>In-person contact is the bes... | 0 |
55711873a03de6c365f45bbb | About a year ago I found out my husband had cheated on me. | Cheating is something unacceptable for me but because we have two daughters I decided not to break up the family.
However, now I am struggling to forget and forgive what happened. I feel like I cannot trust him. Without trust, I cannot stay in this relationship. On the other hand, I do not want my children to get hurt.... | https://counselchat.com/questions/about-a-year-ago-i-found-out-my-husband-had-cheated-on-me | Relationships,Marriage | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>First of all, my heart goes out to you. Infidelity is an extremely challenging obstacle to overcome. There are some things that you should consider. First of all, did he seem truly remorseful? If you felt in his heart that he was truly sorry for what he had done, it will give you a piece of mind that it was a mista... | 0 |
55717c13a03de6c365f45be9 | Sleeping, Anger and Anxiety | I have a lot of issues going on right now. First of all, I have a lot of trouble sleeping at times, while other nights I sleep too much and still feel quite tired. I’m also noticing increased irritability and experiencing anxiety attacks that last for hours. Is there something wrong with me and if so what should I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/sleeping-anger-and-anxiety | Anxiety,Anger Management | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>It sounds as if you may be experiencing a bout of anxiety and/or depression. Sleeping difficulties, irritability and anxiety attacks all are correlated with these mood disorders. And it’s actually quite common for someone to deal encounter this during their lifetime. </p><p>Also, keep in mind that just because you a... | 0 |
5571cff7a03de6c365f45bff | I'm losing my husband because my lack of sex drive | I have no sex drive due to medical issues. I’ve shut down completely and closed everyone out. I’ve even told my husband that I wanted a divorce since that’s what I thought he wanted to hear. However, it devastated me when I learned he's seeing someone else.
I’ve since told him that I wanted to work things out but he’s ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-losing-my-husband-because-my-lack-of-sex-drive | Marriage,Intimacy | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I’m sorry to hear about your current situation. My heart goes out to you during this time.</p><p>First of all, it is of vital importance that you discuss your symptoms with your doctor. Regardless of whether you are able to mend your relationship with your husband, you need to address the physical issues you are exp... | 0 |
55717c13a03de6c365f45be9 | Sleeping, Anger and Anxiety | I have a lot of issues going on right now. First of all, I have a lot of trouble sleeping at times, while other nights I sleep too much and still feel quite tired. I’m also noticing increased irritability and experiencing anxiety attacks that last for hours. Is there something wrong with me and if so what should I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/sleeping-anger-and-anxiety | Anxiety,Anger Management | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Hi there. I have to commend you on reaching out to get some answers on why you are feeling the way that you are feeling. A lot of people secretly go about their lives every day feeling this way because they are too afraid of what the answer might be.</p><p>First off, what stressors do you have in your life right now... | 0 |
557136aaa03de6c365f45bd5 | I need help of letting go of a man who hurt me but it’s so hard. How do I do it? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-need-help-of-letting-go-of-a-man-who-hurt-me-but-it-s-so-hard-how-do-i-do-it | Relationships | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>It is incredibly hard to let go of a relationship that was meaningful in your life. Even though you consider the relationship to be a hurtful one, I’m sure there are some aspects about it that are hard to let go of (i.e. time invested, mutual friends, positive memories, etc). So it is very understandable why it’s ha... | 0 |
55725709a03de6c365f45c37 | My parents are threatening to get rid of the only things I still care about | The last of my emotions belong to my pets. Today my dad said he might get rid of them tomorrow. If that does happen I might dig hole in the ground with a paper that says "here lays my emotions. R.I.P." I practically have no emotions left and I came to the realization about this not being normal by comparing my reaction... | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-parents-are-threatening-to-get-rid-of-the-only-things-i-still-care-about | Family Conflict | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>It sounds to me like you have had a lot going on and now you are afraid you are going to lose the last things you care about, your pets. I do not know what all is going on in your family, and I cannot answer for your dad’s actions or his reasoning behind this.</p><p>I would recommend that you focus on developing he... | 0 |
55723d8aa03de6c365f45c31 | My girlfriend broke up with me but I want her back. What do I do? | Me and my girlfriend just broke up. She said she loves me but is not in love anymore. This came out of nowhere. We seemed so happy together.
It all started when she went to Missouri to visit her family. The first week she was there she was fine then once she went to this one sister’s house everything changed. That's wh... | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-girlfriend-broke-up-with-me-but-i-want-her-back-what-do-i-do | Relationships | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I am sorry to hear of these troubles. I see a few issues here. I wonder why you were both trying to get pregnant when the relationship seemed troubled? Some people think that they can fix a broken relationship by getting pregnant, and all this does is bring up more problems.</p><p>You say you never treated her ba... | 0 |
5572e7a4a03de6c365f45c58 | I endured sexual and physical abuse by my brother as child | Now I have anger and trust issues. How can I treat this and fix myself? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-endured-sexual-and-physical-abuse-by-my-brother-as-child | Domestic Violence,Anger Management,Family Conflict | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I will assume that for whatever reason, you either do not want to or are not able to seek counseling for this. However, I highly urge you to do so because long-term childhood abuse does have negative consequences for your life as an adult, as it seems you are already aware. </p><p>There are confidential and free cr... | 0 |
55723117a03de6c365f45c1a | How can I get people to listen? | I've never been able to talk with my parents. My parents are in their sixties while I am a teenager. I love both of them but not their personalities. I feel that they do not take me seriously whenever I talk about a serious event in my life. If my dad doesn’t believe me, then my mom goes along with my dad and acts like... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-get-people-to-listen | Anxiety,Family Conflict,Depression,Stress,Social Relationships | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Hi there. Being 15 years old can be a very difficult time in your teenage life. I remember when I was 15 and how I often felt my parents weren’t listening to me. It’s even more difficult when you feel that you do not have a friend that you can confide in. </p><p>Having depression in the past and being able to get th... | 0 |
556bfebbc969ba5861709e00 | Dealing with an unfaithful and judgmental significant other | I have been with this guy on and off for 8 years. At first, we used to do things together and our sex life was ok. Then things started to change, we'd break up and reconnect, and he cheated on me numerous times. We've also had two beautiful baby girls during this time. Now we argue and he says I am not affectionate at... | https://counselchat.com/questions/dealing-with-an-unfaithful-and-judgmental-significant-other | Relationships | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>I don't think you’ve lost something, I think you’ve found something - your breaking point, and it's about time. Your boyfriend seems to be a very selfish and immature man who reconnects with you when it's convenient for him. Obviously, he has his own issues, but I want to address yours. I agree you need to talk to s... | 0 |
5571f074a03de6c365f45c0e | How can I control my sexual urges? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-control-my-sexual-urges | Human Sexuality | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>Anything can become an addiction. Eating, gambling, shopping, sex, even exercising. It sounds like this has become a behavioral addiction for you. A therapist can help you identify the underlying reasons and help you learn to control the urges and develop healthier coping skills. </p><p>People turn to an activity... | 0 |
5579d748a9732755160c6a6b | How do I deal with my son's violent thoughts and dreams? | My son claims that hes been having extremely violent thoughts and dreams. Not violent like he's hurting someone, but violent thoughts like horrible things happening to his loved ones. He explained one of his dreams the other day and it was so violent it was sickening. It was far beyond anything in a horror movie, he sa... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-deal-with-my-son-s-violent-thoughts-and-dreams | Anger Management,Sleep Improvement | Jorge Tovar | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jorge-tovar | <p>Let me start my stating this is important to take seriously - taking to his PCP, getting a referral to a pediatric specialist, and getting him to a relational psychotherapist would be my first tasks. </p><p>I wont label this occurrences as "normal" yet it is important to note these things do occur. My first ... | 0 |
5579b477a9732755160c6a52 | I'm experiencing panic attacks when I'm physically separated from my girlfriend | Whenever I leave my girlfriend I get panic attacks. I'm taking medications to control them, but I'm thinking of moving in with her since I get so anxious. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-experiencing-panic-attacks-when-i-m-physically-separated-from-my-girlfriend | Anxiety,Relationships | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p><span>I’m sorry to hear that you are currently experiencing panic attacks. I hope that the medication you have been prescribed has provided you with some relief. Unfortunately, I don’t feel that moving in with your girlfriend would alleviate your anxiety. Although you may feel very anxious about leaving her, your bo... | 0 |
557a0f0ca9732755160c6ab9 | How can I see my base doctor without my ID? | I need to get on base to see my doctor. My ID card was in my wallet which was stolen. I’m unable to reach my husband at this time. He is only one who can take me on base in order to get a new ID so I can continue to see doctor. Is there anything I can do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-see-my-base-doctor-without-my-id | Military Issues | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>Do you have any other form of identification? The first place to stop would be the Visitor’s Center or whichever department issues passes. They are located outside of the gate so you do not need a military ID to enter. If you have another form of identification it’s possible that they can give you a pass in order to... | 0 |
557a4477a9732755160c6ad4 | When should I give up on a relationship? | I’ve known my boyfriend for several years. We were friends for a long time. In 2013 we started a relationship, and he even asked me to move in with him since I lived out of state. I planned to move in with him in 2014 after I finished school and he found a job. However, during this time we had a few arguments and broke... | https://counselchat.com/questions/when-should-i-give-up-on-a-relationship | Relationships,Domestic Violence | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <ol></ol><p>There are plenty of red flags that you have been presented with:</p><ol><li>Several breakups </li><li><span>Not holding up his end of the bargain regarding work</span></li><li><span>Lack of empathy for your miscarriage</span></li><li><span>Lying about his involvement with another woman</span></li><li><span>... | 0 |
557a3994a9732755160c6ac8 | How do I cope and rebuild my life after ending an 11 year abusive marriage? | I am going through a divorce from a narcissistic sociopath who left me for another woman after mentally and emotionally abusing me for 11 years. I have moved to a different state and after giving up my successful business am working as a server at a restaurant. I’m coping as best as I can. Is it normal and healthy to n... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-cope-and-rebuild-my-life-after-ending-an-11-year-abusive-marriage | Domestic Violence,Relationship Dissolution | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I am very sorry to hear of your struggles. I think that it is normal to struggle to get your feet under you again after a divorce, especially after leaving a relationship that lasted 11 years, so try not to be too hard on yourself. Take it one day at a time and do the best you can.</p><p>I notice that you said he ... | 0 |
5579df8da9732755160c6a7f | I'm going through depression right now and my relationship is suffering | I've been married for 3 years and I have two kids. During my 3-years married, my husband cheated on me twice. The second time really got to me and at my lowest I hurt him back. We aren't communicating as well as I would like. What do I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-going-through-depression-right-now-and-my-relationship-is-suffering | Depression,Marriage | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Hi there. Thank you reaching out for help. It takes a lot of courage for someone that is being abused to reach out for help. I want you to know that I am here to help you in any way that I can. </p><p>First and foremost, you did not mention whether or not you had children yourself by this man. I’m going to assume th... | 0 |
5579e690a9732755160c6a88 | How can I let go of my dream wedding? | I have been with my husband for almost 7 years. We got engaged a little after 5 years of being together. I had always been clear that I wanted to get married and I sadly would drop hints about how i wanted him to propose.
When he did propose it was during a random vacation that I had planned. I was happy but I couldn'... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-let-go-of-my-dream-wedding | Marriage | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>It's hard to let go of the dreams you had regarding your wedding and engagement. This was something that you and most women think about for years, so it's understandable to be disappointed. But please be aware that it is rare that any wedding is perfect. You may envy your friends' weddings but more than likely they ... | 0 |
557c45aeb1b211b80376b60e | How do I stop grieving my mother’s death? | What can I do to stop grieving my mother’s death? When I am awake I just cry every day. I don't have anyone to talk to. I need help; I am still cry over her. Will I ever stop crying? It’s been 3 years. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-stop-grieving-my-mother-s-death | Grief and Loss | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I am sorry that you lost your mother. That is a really hard thing for someone to go through.</p><p>There is really no set time for grief to be over, but I agree that if it has been three years and you are still crying every day then this is past the time for normal grief. I do not know how old you are and if you ar... | 0 |
557c72f7b1b211b80376b623 | Where does a child go for help? | I'm having issues with my relative. The police never believe the experiences I have been through because I am only a kid.
I've even had trouble trying to reach a therapist because I said I wanted to get an adult to help me. Could you please give me advice? | https://counselchat.com/questions/where-does-a-child-go-for-help | Family Conflict,Children & Adolescents | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I think it would be wise for you to call a hotline especially designed for children. It's called the Childhelp National Child Abuse Hotline. The number is 1-800-4-A-CHILD (1-800-422-4453). </p><p>It is completely anonymous and a trained therapist will be able to provide you with guidance, confidentiality, and can al... | 0 |
557ddc62b1b211b80376b675 | How do I fix my marriage? | My wife just last week said she wants a divorce and it's all sudden. I understand that marriages have their ups and downs but I don't understand why she can't tell me why she wants a divorce. Should I fight for my family (daughter and wife)? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-fix-my-marriage | Marriage,Relationship Dissolution | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>Chances are, if you really think about it, there were signs that something wasn’t quite right in your marriage. You may have passed these things off as being the normal ups and downs of a marriage, but whatever it was (or wasn't), it's obviously bothering your wife. I would say yes, keep trying to fight for your fam... | 0 |
557dba0bb1b211b80376b66e | How do I find happiness after my boyfriend passed away? | I loved him more than anything. He passed away on our anniversary which was also the day I was going to apply for our apartment. I'm not handling it well. I moved to a new town and started a new life but nothing helps. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-find-happiness-after-my-boyfriend-passed-away | Grief and Loss | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I am so sorry to hear of your boyfriend's passing. Grief is something that can take a long time to recover from. Have you considered speaking with a grief counselor? Being able to speak with someone that specializes in grief would be very beneficial. </p><p>Do not get down on yourself for not recovering quickly. Thi... | 0 |
557da2e6b1b211b80376b660 | How do I remember and deal with things I did as a kid? | I did some horrible sexual things as a kid and I regret everything. Can someone help me cope with myself? Can someone help me remember my past? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-remember-and-deal-with-things-i-did-as-a-kid | Trauma,Human Sexuality | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I'm very sorry to hear this. Hypnosis can be a valuable tool that a trained therapist can use to bring back suppressed memories. However, keep in mind that hypnosis doesn't work for everyone. </p><p>I think regardless, speaking with a therapist about your sexual issues would be beneficial. It seems like you have exp... | 0 |
557d6304b1b211b80376b65a | How do I choose between two guys? | I have been with a guy for 4 years, he's a great guy and we also have a son together. The problem is that I'm in love with a guy that I've been talking to for about 2 years but I've never met him in person. Honestly I'm bored with the relationship I have with the first guy and he makes want to go after the second guy,... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-choose-between-two-guys | Relationships | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Hi there. Wow, this sounds like a sticky situation; however, I’m here to help guide you through this decision. </p><p>First and foremost, you must ask yourself, if you ever loved your sons’ father or was it a situation to where you two got pregnant and stayed together for the child. It’s very common to stay with you... | 0 |
557f06d6b1b211b80376b6ab | What should I do if my boyfriend can't get over my past? | My boyfriend can't get over my promiscuous past. He says he loves me but says the thought of my past is disgusting and a sexual distraction. He says he should have had more sex with different people. I don't know how to handle this. | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-should-i-do-if-my-boyfriend-can-t-get-over-my-past | Relationships,Intimacy | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I am sorry to hear of your relationship struggles. </p><p>One thing I wonder is did you volunteer the information about your past or is this something that he asked about? In the future, it is probably best to leave details out of conversations like this. I think it is common and natural for partners to ask about ... | 0 |
557e7259b1b211b80376b69e | I feel like I could never be with anyone because no one would want me | What do I do if I have been feeling like I could never be with anyone because no one would want me. Or I couldn't have many friends because of who I am. It's strange I want to be loved but I'd hate to be because I always lose. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-feel-like-i-could-never-be-with-anyone-because-no-one-would-want-me | Relationships | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I'm sorry you are feeling uncared for. I'm sure there are plenty of people that care and love for you that you are not taking into consideration. Sometimes when we get upset we may think irrationally and see the world as all or nothing. However, take a deep breath, relax and start focusing on the positive relationsh... | 0 |
55806432a29507431fcd9ebe | How do I stop my step child from hurting my biological child? | What makes my step child, an 8 year old boy, choke my daughter, a 6 year old girl? This has been going on for 4 years. The boy tells my daughter not to tell on him. He knows it's wrong; we have did time out, spanking, taking away toys, and sitting on the wall. I am afraid for my daughters safety! | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-stop-my-step-child-from-hurting-my-biological-child | Anger Management,Parenting | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I can see why you are alarmed. That is a scary situation for a parent. Do you know if the child has been evaluated by a mental health professional? Early treatment is often the key. A professional will be able to help the child learn how to control their anger and mend the troublesome actions into more appropriate r... | 0 |
5579c6a0a9732755160c6a5d | How do I deal with a weird fetish I'm afraid of opening up about? | I have this weird fetish that I'm afraid to open up about it. What should I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-deal-with-a-weird-fetish-i-m-afraid-of-opening-up-about | Intimacy | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>This is difficult to answer because you don’t tell us what the fetish is. I do understand that this is something that is bothering you though. </p><p>The first thing to ask yourself is if this is something that is illegal or not. If this is illegal to engage in, then you need to seek counseling help immediately to... | 0 |
557a0ebca9732755160c6ab5 | What can I do if my coworkers accuse me of mood swings? | My coworkers are making false statements about me to the boss, saying I have mood swings. They have no proof to back it up. Can my employer make me see a therapist of their choice? | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-can-i-do-if-my-coworkers-accuse-me-of-mood-swings | Workplace Relationships | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>I can’t give you legal advice, but employers can suggest you see someone if your behavior is affecting your job. I believe most government agencies have an Employee Assistance Program (EAP) where employees can talk to a therapist about any issue, not just work-related, for free (up to a certain amount of sessions).<... | 0 |
557cbd57b1b211b80376b631 | How do I deal with depression? | I'm in a state of depression right now. Who can I talk to? I've been sick in a lot of pain and crying. Don't know where to turn. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-deal-with-depression | Depression | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>First of all, if you’re sick and in pain, have you seen your doctor? If you have a chronic illness and pain, this can often lead to depression and is very common. You’ve taken the first step to dealing with it. You can talk to your doctor, even if your depression isn’t related to your health. He or she can either lo... | 0 |
557b86f6b1b211b80376b5d9 | What can I do if my parents refuse to acknowledge my anxiety and self-confidence issues? | My dad refuses to acknowledge my anxieties about going to parties, dinners, etc. Whenever I have an opinion it gets shut down. My mom and everyone else behaves likewise. For my father who heads a company, this is normal. He has to be right all the time. He blatantly refuses to even try to see it from my angle.
Recent... | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-can-i-do-if-my-parents-refuse-to-acknowledge-my-anxiety-and-self-confidence-issues | Family Conflict,Self-esteem,Parenting,Anxiety | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I'm sorry to hear that you are unable to get through to your parents. It sounds like you are experiencing a great deal of anxiety that needs to be addressed by a professional (despite the fact that you are unable to at the moment). I would recommend talking with another adult such as a school counselor that can off... | 0 |
557f8f3aa29507431fcd9e78 | How do I overcome being jealous of my boyfriends mother? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-overcome-being-jealous-of-my-boyfriends-mother | Family Conflict | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>Try to think of his close relationship with his mother in a good way. It means that they have a positive family structure which can transfer down to your own family if you have one together in the future. </p><p>Despite your boyfriend having a good relationship with his mother, it will never be equal to the relation... | 0 |
5579c504a9732755160c6a58 | Any suggestions for erection problems? | I'm a 40 year old male and having erection problems. Still have the desire for a woman. Awfully frustrated. Any suggestions? My Doc doesn't want to discuss it. | https://counselchat.com/questions/any-suggestions-for-erection-problems | Intimacy | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Hi there, first off I have to commend you for reaching out. It takes a lot for a man to reach out for help when it comes to erection problems. Believe it or not, this problem is very common for men and women. </p><p>There are some things that you can try naturally, before resulting in medication, such as your eating... | 0 |
557fc9c3a29507431fcd9e9e | How do I move on from my husband's cheating? | My husband cheated on me and it hurt me very bad. It was a time when my health was poor. I'm have a hard time moving on. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-move-on-from-my-husband-s-cheating | Human Sexuality,Marriage | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>How has your husband acted since then? Was he regretful? How did you find out? Did he confess? These are all things that you want to consider. Betrayal is very hard to get over so if it's taking you awhile to get over, know that this is normal.</p><p>Hopefully you're husband has been very regretful and upfront and h... | 0 |
557f2508a29507431fcd9df0 | Why do I keep getting with men that emotionally abuse me? | I've been abused emotionally all of my life and for some reason I keep getting with men that I let emotionally abused me.
How can I stop it? I know the mistakes that I've made in my life. I'm having a really hard time getting back on my feet. Can you help me please? | https://counselchat.com/questions/why-do-i-keep-getting-with-men-that-emotionally-abuse-me | Relationships | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I want to applaud you for taking this first step towards realizing that this is an issue and wanting to do something about it. You are already on the road to a happier life with this realization. A lot of women do not recognize that it may be something about them that continues to attract a man like this and will ... | 0 |
5581331ea29507431fcd9f20 | How can I determine if I should be a boy or girl? | I feel like I would be more comfortable as a girl even though I still like girls. I think I'm like a girl stuck in a guy body. I imagine myself as a girl too. I think this more because my friends say that if I was a girl I would be a hot looking one. And I don't care about having boobs or anything. I just feel like the... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-determine-if-i-should-be-a-boy-or-girl | LGBTQ | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>I understand that gender and/or sexual identity crises can be very difficult to navigate, although in today’s time I think we have made a lot of progress and it is becoming easier for individuals to find themselves and also find acceptance from society.</p><p>I am unsure how old you are. If you are a child or teena... | 0 |
55816eaba29507431fcd9f2a | How do I get over anxiety, depression, and isolation? | I've have lived for sometime with depression but things have gotten a lot better, but why is it so hard to get over anxiety and social isolation? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-get-over-anxiety-depression-and-isolation | Anxiety,Depression | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>The best way to handle depression and anxiety is with a combination of appropriate medication given to you by a medical doctor, and therapy to help you understand the thoughts, feelings, and behaviors that are causing the depression and anxiety in the first place and then to replace these with more positive thoughts... | 0 |
55849048e1d57a380899c160 | What do I do about a cousin who makes me feel belittled, insecure and frustrated? | Hello, I have a cousin in my family who has been making me feel belittled, insecure, and frustrated during her stay here in the city. I know she comes from a place of love, but she has always been short-fused and highly temperamental if something doesn't work out the way she planned it. I have tried my best to coordina... | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-do-i-do-about-a-cousin-who-makes-me-feel-belittled-insecure-and-frustrated | Family Conflict | Rebecca Duellman | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-duellman | <p>Do you have a close friend or relative who's opinion you trust? Ask them for their honest feedback and if they see you like your cousin does. If they don’t see these qualities in you, then it may be your cousin’s issue and she’s taking it out on you. You can always ask her what would be the best way to communicate p... | 0 |
55881f33e1d57a380899c1b2 | I have a son with my girlfriend, but she is emotionally abusive. What do I do? | I have a child with my baby mother. She works I take care of our young son. She says she is not cheating I have not found anything but she always putting me down, telling me to get out and telling me she doesn't love me, but then the next day after our fight she says she does. I'm having a hard time because before our ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-have-a-son-with-my-girlfriend-but-she-is-emotionally-abusive-what-do-i-do | Domestic Violence | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>It sounds like you are in a tough situation. You have to ask yourself why you don't want to leave her. Is it because of the child? Or is it because you want the relationship to work? You must consider that being in an abusive relationship is not healthy for you or your child. So if the abuse continues, it would be m... | 0 |
559399cd072cf5401c482525 | What can I do to help my dad stop drinking? | Or how to send him somewhere that can help him, something like The Baker Act. | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-can-i-do-to-help-my-dad-stop-drinking | Substance Abuse,Addiction | Kristi King-Morgan, LMSW | https://counselchat.com/therapists/kristi-king-morgan-lmsw | <p>More information would be needed for me to accurately answer this question, such as your age, whether you live with your dad or not, and what other family members live in the household. </p><p>Something like this, alcoholism, is a whole family disease. In other words, family members often unknowingly contribute to ... | 0 |
558c00e843308c50345fdde9 | My son and family has different views about religion. How do I resolve these differences? | In particular during family gatherings (such as funerals), where there are different customs. | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-son-and-family-has-different-views-about-religion-how-do-i-resolve-these-differences | Spirituality,Family Conflict | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I think the best thing you can do is be respectful of each family member's wishes. Although everyone may not agree with one another, the most important thing you can do for each other is to respect their faith and beliefs instead of trying to sway them in a certain direction. </p><p>There are many families that are ... | 0 |
559ad930277cbf7c0d482130 | How do I get over a slump? | I don't know what's wrong with me. At times I can be really happy, excited, I'll talk fast, and I want to do things. But lately I've been staying up way later and sleeping too much. I don't hang out with friends, I don't really have them. I feel nothing, worthless. I want to do nothing, I have no interest in anything. ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-get-over-a-slump | Depression | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>I'm sorry to hear that you are feeling as if you're in a slump. First of all, nothing is wrong with you. Many people report similar symptoms. Have you ever talked with a physician regarding your symptoms? Two extreme emotions such as feeling extremely happy and then feeling extremely low for a length of time may ind... | 0 |
55869458e1d57a380899c19c | How do I approach my doctor about seeing a therapist? | I'm worried I should see a therapist due to past events and current mental status. I'm just so unsure of how to ask my doctor about seeing someone. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-approach-my-doctor-about-seeing-a-therapist | Professional Ethics | Danielle Alvarez | https://counselchat.com/therapists/danielle-alvarez | <p>Thanks for your question. I'm glad you realize that you need extra support and are being proactive. Simply explain to your doctor the feelings you have been experiencing and how you feel that speaking with a mental health therapist would be beneficial. However, keep in mind that you do not have to go into detail ab... | 0 |
55a2c01f8b5105b6037e5f85 | How can I slow down and enjoy life? | I feel like my time is going too fast | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-slow-down-and-enjoy-life | Anxiety | Keisha Helms | https://counselchat.com/therapists/keisha-helms | <p>Thank you for reaching out! That is a great question! As an American, I can truly say that I spend way too much time on the go! It is a proven fact that Americans live in a fast paced environment compared to Europe! I often ask myself, what if I only had one day left on this Earth? What would I do? Well, that is an ... | 0 |
55869458e1d57a380899c19c | How do I approach my doctor about seeing a therapist? | I'm worried I should see a therapist due to past events and current mental status. I'm just so unsure of how to ask my doctor about seeing someone. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-approach-my-doctor-about-seeing-a-therapist | Professional Ethics | Eric Ström, JD, MA, LMHC | https://counselchat.com/therapists/eric-str-m-jd-ma-lmhc | <p>Having this kind of conversation with a doctor can feel difficult. But remember, you are the expert on you. Any good medical professional will recognize that.</p><p>You are absolutely right to think about the importance of being your own health care advocate. Generally, the best approach is simply to be honest. ... | 0 |
55a2a0568b5105b6037e5f7a | I get depressed whenever anyone I care about is too busy to be with me. What do I do? | My last relationships have ended horribly. They just up and abandoned me. One of them I have never gotten closure with over it, leaving me emotionally wrecked. I know something's wrong with me but I don't know how to even start trying to better myself.
I get into these depressed like states whenever anyone I care about... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-get-depressed-whenever-anyone-i-care-about-is-too-busy-to-be-with-me-what-do-i-do | Social Relationships,Anxiety,Depression | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>Frequently when working with clients, I utilize the A-B-C model developed by Albert Ellis, the founder of Rational Emotive Behavior Theory. The theory basically states that you can not control an event but you can control your reaction to the emotions associated with said event. For instance here is an example:</p><... | 0 |
5580b450a29507431fcd9eee | How do I start talking again after a fight? | I haven't uttered one word to my boyfriend in days. Now I'm over it and don't know how to approach the situation? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-start-talking-again-after-a-fight | Relationships | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>In any relationship, it is important to be able to say "I'm sorry" because it shows vulnerability and openness. I recommend that you sit and have a discussion with him now that you are calm about why you were upset and how you would like to handle such incidents in the future. If you find yourself becoming u... | 0 |
5579dca3a9732755160c6a7b | How do I get out of an abusive relationship? | I've been with my boyfriend over 3 years. He cheated on me and the woman is now pregnant. He is physically and mentally abusive towards me. I have attempted to talk with him in order to resolve our issues; however, he never wants to talk and often blames me for everything.
I’m always there when he needs my help. He tel... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-get-out-of-an-abusive-relationship | Domestic Violence,Relationships | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>That sounds like a very hurtful situation. Unfortunately, without a batterers intervention course or a desire to change, the abuse cycle is unlikely to stop. I do not recommend that you try to leave on your own due that being the most dangerous time when in an abusive relationship. As an abuser, his goal is to contr... | 0 |
55d3d0183d30679529aa1619 | I'm in love with a sex offender, but my family doesn't accept him | I started dating a guy I met online. He told me that he registered sex offender but he didn't do anything. He took a plea to always register as sex offender and he did two years. That was more than two decades ago. Nothing on his record since.
I always believe the past should be left in past. But my roommates, their fa... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-in-love-with-a-sex-offender-but-my-family-doesn-t-accept-him | Family Conflict,Relationships | Britta Neinast | https://counselchat.com/therapists/britta-neinast-valparaiso | <p>Thank you for your question. Trust is a huge thing in relationships and when that is broken, or perceived as being broken, it takes a long time to repair. From what you shared, it sounds like your boyfriend took steps to correct the situation and has shown to be trustworthy since. Unfortunately, no matter how much w... | 0 |
55d2c26319a09db163aa501f | I weigh over 220 pounds and I am 16 years old | About 3 years ago or so I was skinny, but I was still ugly. I really do want to change that but I've tried 3 times. Now can I try but don't stop. At school I get bullied about my weight and my ugliness and I have been bullied my whole life that I believe them.
How can I stop thinking about them and don't let it get in ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-weigh-over-220-pounds-and-i-am-16-years-old | Self-esteem | Amy Fortney Parks | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amy-fortney-parks | <p>Hey! I am so impressed with your efforts to ask questions, to figure out how to change the messages that you hear (and say to yourself), and to get support! And it sounds like you want to make some changes in your life! Take a walk over to the counseling office at school, the school nurse or consider reaching out... | 0 |
55d4ffb4c3c0b0bb0dd6252f | I'm a 19 year old male with low self esteem. I've always been very closed off about my feelings and problems. | A few nights ago I talked to this girl I know about my self esteem issues for the first time. We talked for hours and she told me time and again that I was a great guy. She told me I was attractive, and have a great personality, etc. I really started to feel better about myself by the time I woke up the next morning.
N... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-a-19-year-old-male-with-low-self-esteem-i-ve-always-been-very-closed-off-about-my-feelings-and-problems | Self-esteem,Relationships | Amy Fortney Parks | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amy-fortney-parks | <p>Hey! It takes a lot of courage to share your feelings with someone! And it sounds like you have been lucky to meet someone who makes you feel safe enough to explore some of your more painful feelings. A big part of the process, however, of strengthening your self-concept is learning how to tell yourself those pos... | 0 |
55d71db3ff9b28e51abfd230 | I lied to my mom, then felt bad and told her the truth | She cried because she lost all trust in me. Now I feel disgusting and like my heart just got stabbed, what do I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-lied-to-my-mom-then-felt-bad-and-told-her-the-truth | Parenting | Amy Fortney Parks | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amy-fortney-parks | <p>Hey! Sounds like the part of you that knows the RIGHT thing to do won here! I am so proud of you for admitting that you lied to your Mom! Sometimes lies come out of our mouths before we can even catch them because we are trying to say what the other person wants to hear. I bet that, as you begin to show her that... | 0 |
55d7bd0ac724b5b66655bf7d | I tell my husband I love him. But I don't believe it or feel it. | When having sex I think of other men and want other men all day long. Been married 3 years, together 14. What do you think? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-tell-my-husband-i-love-him-but-i-don-t-believe-it-or-feel-it | Intimacy | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Sustaining passion in marriage is tough stuff. It's a relatively modern dilemma you are facing with perhaps unrealistic expectations of what marriage "should" be. It sounds like your definitions of love and sexual passion have merged together, that's both common and confusing! Intimacy and sexuality within y... | 0 |
55d7b9a2c724b5b66655bf7c | How do couples keep from being at risk for divorce? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-couples-keep-from-being-at-risk-for-divorce | Marriage,Relationship Dissolution | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>The Gottmans have been studying relationships in their "love lab" for over 4 decades and what they've found is pretty awesome. There are 4 things that, when added together and built up over time, predict divorce: criticism, defensiveness, contempt & stonewalling. These behaviors lead towards emotional di... | 0 |
55d72ae1699442633eb3fdb7 | My wife and I have been married for over 3 years and we're tired of having sex | We make love once per month. Is it normal? | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-wife-and-i-have-been-married-for-over-3-years-and-we-re-tired-of-having-sex | Intimacy | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>To begin with, what's normal for one couple isn't going to be normal for the next, every couple has their own normal and that's important to keep in mind. Your sexual lives will ebb and flow. What I'd be more curious about is the quality rather than the quantity of the sex you are having. I'd also want you both to r... | 0 |
55d19067a412a77b78006ad8 | I feel like my friends are ganging up on me | In this argument my friends are all against me so I'm wondering if I'm exaggerating my feelings. I feel like I'm being attacked and that is making me blow things out of proportion and taking the role of the victim, when in reality I'm the one being unreasonable and I am simply annoying my reasonable friends. Or are the... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-feel-like-my-friends-are-ganging-up-on-me | Social Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Conflict is a tricky beast and shows up in <b>every</b> one of our relationships. What I'm reading is that you find yourself in a loop of seeking validation of your thoughts and feelings from your friends rather than validating yourself. Am I right? If you aren't validating yourself, no one else will be able to eit... | 0 |
55d7b150c724b5b66655bf77 | I had a baby about 2 months ago and I really haven't been feeling myself | I am always down and out. Could this be postpartum depression? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-had-a-baby-about-2-months-ago-and-i-really-haven-t-been-feeling-myself | Depression | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Probably. I always tell the new parents I work with (and this is just as true for dads as it is for moms) that if you are feeling <i>off</i>, seek help. Postpartum Support International (www.postpartum.net) is a great place to start finding resources and locating support. </p> | 0 |
55d336dd35a79f036cc8caf8 | I had an affair almost two decades ago. Recently found out it resulted in a child | I am married to a beautiful lady. I love my wife with all my heart. We have 3 boys and I have a daughter from a previous marriage. We also have 3 grandchildren.
Now this event is tearing us apart. I want our family to be together and happy. It was a mistake from so long ago. My wife wants to leave and I don't want that... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-had-an-affair-almost-two-decades-ago-recently-found-out-it-resulted-in-a-child | Family Conflict,Marriage | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>If your wife is willing, seek out a qualified couples therapist! Look for one trained in the Gottman Method or Emotionally Focused Therapy. Your relationship is repairable, but you may need some qualified support in the process. </p> | 0 |
55d57bd32a0cba0c37027cd3 | I'm having a lot of conflict in my relationship | We do communicate but one of us has trouble accepting what the other person says. How can I fix things? | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-m-having-a-lot-of-conflict-in-my-relationship | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Being able to accept your partner's influence is a key relationship skill. And it's very two sided. Chances are if you don't feel your partner is being influenced by you, they likely don't feel you are being influenced by them either. The best <i>fix </i>you can practice is to soften yourself into your partner and ... | 0 |
55c6cdd64beecdd02c51e5ab | My wife has a diminished libido, and is faking orgasms and denying it. What do I do? | My wife and I are newly married, about 2 months. We've had some issues surrounding sex, particularly her lack of libido. She's on an anxiety medication, of which diminished libido is a side effect, but I think our issue is also partly one of a lack of intimacy/romance centered around my hectic schedule. Our sex life ha... | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-wife-has-a-diminished-libido-and-is-faking-orgasms-and-denying-it-what-do-i-do | Intimacy | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>You are newly married, you Have a hectic schedule, your wife is on anti anxiety medication. What if you take the focus (hint: pressure) off of her orgasms and focus instead on connecting with one another. You know, like the gestures you each likely made while dating. It turns out that these little moments of connec... | 0 |
55d7ef864feb362775094ade | How do I cope with losing my mom? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-cope-with-losing-my-mom | Grief and Loss | Britta Neinast | https://counselchat.com/therapists/britta-neinast-valparaiso | <p>First, I want to say how sorry I am for your loss. The grief of losing a parent can be very difficult to work through. When you lose someone you love, you are forever changed. The goal of working through any loss is to reach a "new normal." Though you will never forget your mom, the grief processing is about... | 0 |
55d6bd42784e4b56070d3c70 | How do I cope with "never being good enough?" | I'm always told I'm not good enough or trying hard enough. I put 100% in to every thing. I'm worn out, I've worked on all of my family relationships, I'm doing great in school, I'm kind to those in need and otherwise. I stick to my religious beliefs and leave room for mistakes and learn from others so I don't have to m... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-cope-with-never-being-good-enough | Family Conflict,Self-esteem | Amber Madden, MA, LPCA | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amber-madden-ma-lpca | <p>Hello, and let me say first, what a great question! </p><p>There are so many people putting forth their 100% everyday and often times, do not get the credit they deserve. Without being able to fully understand where you're question is coming from, I think there are a couple of different ways to look at this question... | 0 |
55d6bd42784e4b56070d3c70 | How do I cope with "never being good enough?" | I'm always told I'm not good enough or trying hard enough. I put 100% in to every thing. I'm worn out, I've worked on all of my family relationships, I'm doing great in school, I'm kind to those in need and otherwise. I stick to my religious beliefs and leave room for mistakes and learn from others so I don't have to m... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-cope-with-never-being-good-enough | Family Conflict,Self-esteem | Dr. Rachelle Vaughan | https://counselchat.com/therapists/dr-rachelle-vaughan | <p>The feeling of never feeling good enough usually stems from our early relationship with our parents or significant role models who made us to feel we were never good enough to meet their standards. In the healing process, you'll need to work on discovering the root source of where these thoughts and feelings come fr... | 0 |
55d7d750c724b5b66655bf9d | I have been in a relationship for a year and 7 months these few weeks have been bad | He's been losing feelings and he doesn't know why. I love him very very much. He sometimes thinks I'm obsessed when I'm not at all. I give him his space and I make sure he's okay but sometimes I think if me and him saw each other more it would be better?
I truly want me and him to get better, it's kind of hard not to ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-have-been-in-a-relationship-for-a-year-and-7-months-these-few-weeks-have-been-bad | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>I'm willing to bet that this isn't what you are hoping to hear, but I'd suggest giving him space. Ooph, that's a tough one, right?! I know. But here's the thing, when you keep trying to process and talk it out with him you keep pushing him away. He needs to feel like a solid and whole person (as you do too) to be ab... | 0 |
55da0b0f1b410d6a295fe7d4 | How do you deal with mental illness (depression, anxiety) in a relationship? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-you-deal-with-mental-illness-depression-anxiety-in-a-relationship | Depression,Anxiety,Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | Great Question! Anxiety and depression are part of the lenses from which you and partner see your world and relationship. Understanding your own and one another's triggers are the key to building a successful relationship. My colleague and co-host for this Friday's free <a href="https://connectfulness.leadpages.co/rela... | 0 |
556b6940c969ba5861709de4 | How do I break an unhealthy relationship pattern? | I want a secure relationship with someone that wants to be with me and who will actually put effort into it.
I seem to gravitate toward unavailable men and those that want intimacy and no relationship. I let men dictate and control me because they accuse me of being controlling. I let men emotionally abuse me and I am ... | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-break-an-unhealthy-relationship-pattern | Relationship Dissolution | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>You may be interested in reading my most recent post, <a href="http://connectfulness.com/intimacy-begins-with-you/" target="">Intimacy Begins With You</a>. In it I offer 7 expert tips to help you get started on a path of self connection and discovery. This is important stuff to do in order to work through that stuff... | 0 |
55dbae2d0cc7953a25e7ecce | I want to get back with my kid's mother and be a family again | I regret ever hurting her and they mean the world to me. But it feels like nothing I do seem to work.
I'll always love them no matter what and when I'm with them nothing else matters. I love them more then anything. I don't want another guy raising my kids. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-want-to-get-back-with-my-kid-s-mother-and-be-a-family-again | Parenting,Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>How you you expressed your regret and taken responsibility for the pain thus far? Repair is a very essential skill in and part of developing healthy relationships. Your love sounds deep, sit with that. Also sit with how she's been hurt. You get to feel your hurt too and your kids. In feeling all this you may also fi... | 0 |
55d455264eadfb434bcb5c02 | How do balance attention between my girlfriend and my dogs? | I have dog obsession disorder and I am having problems with my girlfriend because I am placing more importance to my two dogs over her. How do I get over this problem and prioritize my girlfriend over my two dogs? | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-balance-attention-between-my-girlfriend-and-my-dogs | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Hey, dogs are cool. They adore pleasing humans and often LOVE to work on learning what you want and expect from them. Your girlfriend on the other hand, likely has her own desires and needs that she attend to before tuning into yours. You are good with dogs, that tells me that you've spent some time observing their ... | 0 |
55dcbb35d547570d0481df0e | I recently lied to my fiancé about my past | I find myself lying about small everyday things that there is really no need to lie about. How do I figure out what triggers me to do this? And how do I help overcome this problem? I would like to become more honest and open no matter the situation. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-recently-lied-to-my-fianc-about-my-past | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Well let's start with the awesome realization you've already had, you want to notice that you have triggers. That's huge. Really. </p><p>I find that when people lie, it's most often as a defense mechanism. Which is likely a flag that something doesn't feel safe. What exactly doesn't feel safe could be lots of differ... | 0 |
55d919106108dab858f9a027 | How do I deal with depersonalisation and derealisation? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-deal-with-depersonalisation-and-derealisation | null | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>Typically depersonalization disorder is diagnosed and treated through the use of medication and psychotherapy. I recommend that you look within your insurance network for a provider that offers ongoing therapy services for these concerns. It is important to have these concerns treated through more conventional means... | 0 |
55d431424eadfb434bcb5bfa | I keep on changing my life when things get tough. | I've been like this ever since I was in school; back then I transferred to another school. Now I'm thinking about changing my job. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-keep-on-changing-my-life-when-things-get-tough | Anxiety,Career Counseling | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>I recommend that you make a list of all the reasons you should change your life and all of the reasons you shouldn't change your life. Can the problem you are in be fixed? Is there others you can lean on for support? Are there other people you know who have been through a similar experience and are willing to share ... | 0 |
55d4319d4eadfb434bcb5bfd | How can I be more confident around girls? | I keep hearing I am attractive from people around me, and I think I believe it. But I have low confidence regarding approaching girls I like. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-be-more-confident-around-girls | Self-esteem,Relationships | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>I recommend that you focus on the negative thoughts or irrational beliefs that are going through your mind at the time in which you are trying to approach a girl. When you are aware of the negative thoughts or irrational beliefs, you can then work on changing them. An easy way to recognize an irrational belief is a ... | 0 |
55df7f880bb1f4f044e0095d | Me and my girlfriend of 7 years are looking for some free couples counseling in Modesto, CA | We have been fighting a lot and have 3 kids but we both want to stay together. I need some help to save our family. | https://counselchat.com/questions/me-and-my-girlfriend-of-7-years-are-looking-for-some-free-couples-counseling-in-modesto-ca | Relationships | Amber Madden, MA, LPCA | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amber-madden-ma-lpca | <p>Hello, I do not live in the California area. However, perhaps I could make some suggestions as to where you might look for free counseling. First, I must mention that most insurances now cover for many different types of issues, including family issues. If your girlfriend lives with you, most insurances now cover &#... | 0 |
55e3d854cc6b2b1c1ce52192 | My ex-boyfriend and I broke up about 3 months ago and now he wants me back | I'm currently dating someone else and I really like him. But I love and miss my ex so much. What do I do? | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-ex-boyfriend-and-i-broke-up-about-3-months-ago-and-now-he-wants-me-back | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Finding the right person is a tricky thing to do. Why did you and your ex break up 3 months ago? In relationships with others you get to see a reflection of yourself. Sometimes you may enjoy that reflection, other times it may not feel so good. I'm not sure where you are in your life and relationships and what you ... | 0 |
55e7cedadbe19775524b13a2 | How do I cope with the feelings like I'm not good enough? | I feel like I have to be promiscuous in order to keep people around? It started after I got raped by my ex-boyfriend. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-cope-with-the-feelings-like-i-m-not-good-enough | Relationships,Self-esteem | Jessica Dobbs | https://counselchat.com/therapists/jessica-dobbs | <p>I recommend that you seek professional services to address the trauma you experienced. EMDR has been proven to be very effective in treating trauma. In addition, a support group might be helpful to find a more stable support network. Either a support group for victims of rape or sex/love addiction <a href="http://ww... | 0 |
55e5f4856ac2b0c65954a852 | I cheated on my husband with one of his good friends a few years ago | We kissed and he grabbed my boobs and we exchanged some texts and a few calls. It went on for about 8 months. Just when we were all together and our spouses were out of the room. Once I met him for lunch to tell him that we needed to stop. We ended up kissing after lunch and then I sent him a few more texts that day te... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-cheated-on-my-husband-with-one-of-his-good-friends-a-few-years-ago | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>The issue at hand here is that you're betrayal broke his trust. In order to repair your relationship you will both need to <span style="color: rgba(26, 26, 26, 0.701961);float: none;background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255);">confront the infidelity. And both of you will need to honor yourselves by communicating your fee... | 0 |
55711873a03de6c365f45bbb | About a year ago I found out my husband had cheated on me. | Cheating is something unacceptable for me but because we have two daughters I decided not to break up the family.
However, now I am struggling to forget and forgive what happened. I feel like I cannot trust him. Without trust, I cannot stay in this relationship. On the other hand, I do not want my children to get hurt.... | https://counselchat.com/questions/about-a-year-ago-i-found-out-my-husband-had-cheated-on-me | Relationships,Marriage | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Let's just start with acknowledging that trust is huge and betrayal hurts. You're entitled to your feelings; all of them and you need to know that your husband understands you. That said some ways are more effective at rebuilding and repairing relationships that others. I am a big fan of The Gottman Method for coupl... | 0 |
55e2686eae458abc371e078c | How do I quit letting little things bother me and be the mom that my kids deserve? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-quit-letting-little-things-bother-me-and-be-the-mom-that-my-kids-deserve | Parenting | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Gratitude. <br/><br/>Overly simplified, but that's the trick. When you can let in and celebrate the good stuff everything will start to find more balance. Our brains are fine tuned to focus on and highlight all the icky ugly stuff and file it away to try and avoid it in the future. We don't process the good stuff in... | 0 |
55de7d6a368d07e003f28d2a | I have come to the realization that my boyfriend and I want different things | I feel that I need to end my present relationship. He lives three hours away and likes the reassurance of having someone to talk to multiple times per day and seeing me once or twice a month. I want someone who is more present and more of a life companion.
Lately, he has had a very busy work schedule and I have only s... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-have-come-to-the-realization-that-my-boyfriend-and-i-want-different-things | Relationships,Anxiety | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Sounds like your panic is less about loosing the relationship you are in (which by the way doesn't sound like it's meeting YOUR need for connection) and more about being alone. Being with him is serving you, even if the relationship is less than ideal, from being alone. Being alone can be scary. You'd have to face y... | 0 |
55ed2b76eeca901c0e7c12d2 | Should I be concerned that my boyfriend will not introduce me to a female friend | He goes out with her to dinner/brunch/movies when we are not together (we live 2 hours apart). | https://counselchat.com/questions/should-i-be-concerned-that-my-boyfriend-will-not-introduce-me-to-a-female-friend | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>Would you have the same desire to meet this friend if she were a he? If you are concerned that their friendship is a substitute for you when you aren't present, <u>talk to him</u>. It sounds like you are concerned that he is building an emotional intimacy with her and spending time doing the sort of things with her ... | 0 |
557e7259b1b211b80376b69e | I feel like I could never be with anyone because no one would want me | What do I do if I have been feeling like I could never be with anyone because no one would want me. Or I couldn't have many friends because of who I am. It's strange I want to be loved but I'd hate to be because I always lose. | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-feel-like-i-could-never-be-with-anyone-because-no-one-would-want-me | Relationships | Earl Lewis | https://counselchat.com/therapists/earl-lewis | <p>What would make you feel no one wants to be with you?</p> | 0 |
55f1bc18934eadd0573da77d | What do you do if your partner isn't satisfying your needs sexually? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-do-you-do-if-your-partner-isn-t-satisfying-your-needs-sexually | Intimacy | Earl Lewis | https://counselchat.com/therapists/earl-lewis | <p>Depends: What do would you like to see happen?</p> | 0 |
55f57dc464addbfb68de8d9c | Am I unworthy of being in a meaningful relationship? | I'm in a relationship, but I feel like I'm always putting more into it and not getting reciprocated. My ex told me that I will never find anyone else, and that's lingering in the back of my mind. | https://counselchat.com/questions/am-i-unworthy-of-being-in-a-meaningful-relationship | Relationships | Rebecca Wong | https://counselchat.com/therapists/rebecca-wong | <p>The most crucial key to any relationship is that mutual feeling you hold between you both: that you matter. Sounds like you are stuck in a cycle of hearing your ex say you don't matter. That's why it didn't work with him btw. He wasn't reflecting to you that you mattered. However it ended, clearly though that's the... | 0 |
55fb0b37b6e30dc92f5089f5 | How do I communicate with my boyfriend of ten years without him feeling like I'm attacking him? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-do-i-communicate-with-my-boyfriend-of-ten-years-without-him-feeling-like-i-m-attacking-him | Relationships | Vladimire Calixte | https://counselchat.com/therapists/vladimire-calixte | <p>To follow please find some tips on getting your message across to each other, which will help you both stay emotionally connected in a healthy respectful way!</p><p>Step 1: Start with I...+ feeling (For example, I feel angry because...)</p><p>Step 2: About what... (Not describing your partner but the situation.)&nbs... | 0 |
55ee14b1f6e37aad3143655b | I am fearful of social situations and avoiding people all together | This is preventing me from getting a job. I have bad relationship with my bipolar mother. I am living with her but it stresses me out so much to be around her that I have locked myself in my room. I have no friends or other family to help me. I have no money for therapy, but I think I need therapy before I can secure a... | https://counselchat.com/questions/i-am-fearful-of-social-situations-and-avoiding-people-all-together | Anxiety | Diana Johnson, MS, LPC | https://counselchat.com/therapists/diana-johnson-ms-lpc | <p>A good first step would be to make an appointment with your primary care provider & discuss your concerns. They would have resources available to help in your particular situation.</p> | 0 |
5612b4dd76ab99287e3b88ed | How can I train myself to stop eating when I'm full? | I have no self control over food. Most people stop when they've had enough, but I keep eating for the pleasure of it. Especially with sweets - I'm never done eating dessert. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-train-myself-to-stop-eating-when-i-m-full | Eating Disorders,Addiction | Amber Madden, MA, LPCA | https://counselchat.com/therapists/amber-madden-ma-lpca | <p>Hello! I'm so glad you decided to write in today. This is such a great question and I'm sure many others will relate to exactly what you're describing. There are a few different ways we can look at in understanding your concern. </p><p>First, I think it's important to understand food is just food. Food is meant to n... | 0 |
5612b4dd76ab99287e3b88ed | How can I train myself to stop eating when I'm full? | I have no self control over food. Most people stop when they've had enough, but I keep eating for the pleasure of it. Especially with sweets - I'm never done eating dessert. | https://counselchat.com/questions/how-can-i-train-myself-to-stop-eating-when-i-m-full | Eating Disorders,Addiction | DJ Burr | https://counselchat.com/therapists/dj-burr | <p>I would recommend removing yourself from the environment you are in after you have finished eating. A simple walk around the block, calling up a friend and going to visit, or even going to another room in the house can help. If you find that you truly have no self control over food, I recommend attending Overeaters ... | 0 |
55f9cfb41bdd1dae56cc561a | What can I communicate with a person who is sensitive to negativity in a disagreement? | I know someone who is extremely sensitive to stress and very sensitive to a negative tone of voice. Sometimes during a disagreement he tells me that my communication is having a harmful impact on him. Once he believes I am being negative I can't seem to find a better way of communicating. In fact, it is often a self fu... | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-can-i-communicate-with-a-person-who-is-sensitive-to-negativity-in-a-disagreement | Relationships | Diana Johnson, MS, LPC | https://counselchat.com/therapists/diana-johnson-ms-lpc | <p>With any type of criticism, it is usually best to introduce the topic at a neutral time, ie: when both of you are relaxed, with no current stressors involved, having fun, etc. </p><p>Begin with a non-judgmental reflective comment about a recent bothersome event, as if it were just then crossing your mind (therefore... | 0 |
55fa06471c9509fb5a04c0ff | My new husband is constantly talking to himself. | When I ask him who he is talking to, he tells me no one. But, it sounds like he is holding a conversation with someone. I have even accused him of having a secret cell phone. I ask so much, I feel like I am losing it. Is he trying to make me question my sanity, or is he talking to himself? | https://counselchat.com/questions/my-new-husband-is-constantly-talking-to-himself | Relationships | Diana Johnson, MS, LPC | https://counselchat.com/therapists/diana-johnson-ms-lpc | <p>A rare topic & likely extremely troublesome for you... I would need to have more background information on the two of you before <span style="font-size: 14px; line-height: 1.42857;">beginning to offer any insight. Feel free to email me.</span></p><p>I would also like to add that aside from the reality of whether... | 0 |
561ed77ddb761a811c20a28d | What is the proper procedure if your child's therapist is leaving the practice to work elsewhere? | null | https://counselchat.com/questions/what-is-the-proper-procedure-if-your-child-s-therapist-is-leaving-the-practice-to-work-elsewhere | Professional Ethics | Eric Ström, JD, MA, LMHC | https://counselchat.com/therapists/eric-str-m-jd-ma-lmhc | When terminating employment, counselors need to make sure they don't abandon their clients. <div><br></div><div>There are several ways a counselor can avoid abandoning a client. First, the counselor can refer the client to another clinician at the place of employment. Second, the counselor could refer the client t... | 0 |
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